28 January

What’s up, diary?

Arnold and I rented a video yesterday that had a king in it named Arnold. 
Now Arnold wants to be a king, too. 
In the movie there were thousands of people who were crowded together in the town-square to wave at their king.
“Look at all those people waving at me,” Arnold said.
“Idiot,” I said. “They’re not waving at you.”
“Then how come they all have signs that say LONG LIVE KING ARNOLD?” Arnold asked.
Arnold told me that starting today he’s going to start talking like a king. 
Since he’s a king, he won’t have to go to school any more. 
Because royal people don’t have to go to school. 
Royal people just have to be at home and glide gracefully from room to room.
Then I told Arnold that royal people have to go to fancy balls and eat caviar and drink wine.
“Mmmm, yum,” King Arnold said.
“And you have to eat with a knife and a fork,” I said.
Then Arnold resigned as king. He doesn’t know how to eat with a knife and fork.
But Arnold still wants to have a big celebration, just like the king in the movie had. 
Arnold has a recipe for home-made fire works that we can use. 
We’re going to experiment some later this afternoon. 
Arnold said that I should write a will before I come over, “just in case.” 

I can’t figure out what he meant.

Just in case,
 I’m getting out of this place!